We wish we had known more about how every adopted child has trauma, even if adopted at birth, and the impact on the parents and biological children. Some of our adopted kids have less trauma than others, but there is definitely trauma with all of them, even though we have had all of them since they were newborns.
We struggled for many years with behavior that we had no idea what to do with. We felt very alone and thought maybe it was our fault. We didn't know we were dealing with RAD. We didn't get a diagnosis until she was 12. We ended up needing specialized therapists, hospitalizations, respite care, in-home care, residential treatment, and now financial assistance for out of home placement.
Once our state got involved, we actually did get some decent services, compared to a lot of other stories we have heard. But getting a diagnosis was difficult. She was diagnosed with everything else by multiple providers, but no one was willing to give a RAD diagnosis, which is exactly what we needed to know better how to support her.
We have had to reach out more for financial assistance. We did get a direct and matching grant from Lifesong, which has been a huge blessing.
